Got the job...and one of those days!

You know its going to be one of those days when you wake up late for work! As i got up out of bed, i spilled a glass of water everywhere and then stepped on some of my make-up....by this point i didnt even want to think about what my blood sugars were, sure enough 15mmols Grrrr!!

Took a correction, no breakfast and off to work, day didnt get any better as we were short staffed and it was complete chaos!! My phone decided to die on me even though it had been charging all night and i somehow managed to swallow a fly outside.. Thank god it was a half day i went straight to bed when i got home and stayed there until dinner time lol oh and the freeview decided to break too, what a horrible morning!

Anyway on to the good news.........I got the job!!

Apparently out of the 4 candidates they interviewed, i was the only one to be invited back and i did really well in the interviews! I start of the 12th december, just after my christmas do weekend with the pre-school, so i have decided it has to be a good one, as it was also be my leaving do!! It will be really sad to go and im going to miss everyone so much :(

So i am looking forward to the chistmas do so much, we go away for the weekend to a lovely 4 star hotel, dress up, have a 3 course meal followed by a disco! We did it last year and it was awesome! Also looking forward to hopefully going to london in december for the circle D meet :) Oh and getting my new phone upgrade in a couple of weeks yay! :D

promising changes?

First off, HAPPY WORLD DIABETES DAY FOR YESTERDAY! :D

I may be starting to believe all this about things happening for a reason!

Over the past few weeks iv had alot of things go wrong with a new job lined up to take over my 2nd job! long story short, they totally messed me about, and having already handed in (and worked) my notice of my previous employment, it left me without a 2nd job! So for the past two weeks i have been working part time which as anyone knows does not pay anywhere near enough to live on!

So i thought that i needed to make some changes, and although i LOVE my job at the pre-school i needed to find a proper full time job with decent pay! So although it pained me to do, i joined a recruitment agency and sent of my CV to a private nursery nurse job local to me.....and got a call back the next morning!

Had the inititial interview last week which was really daunting as its been 3 years since i had a formal interview and there were so many questions and scenarios....anyway they seemed really happy and asked me to come back the following week (today!) to do an activity with the children, so thats where i have just come back from and it went really well, got some really good feedback and now i have to wait until tomoro to find out if i am in!! Its a really good position and alot more money :D

So im thinking maybe its a good thing that i was messed around with that job, as it has lead me to take a good look at my life and change it for the better, and maybe if i sort out one aspect of my life, others may follow. speaking of which i have also joined the gym (I say joined, i got a docs referral)..... :)

Although i still dont believe i got diabetes for any reason...that one im still working out :p

Fingers and toes crossed everyone!

Flu jab ...for or against?

Well after having no problems with the flu jab last year i went in for my routine appointment, not expecting to have it there and then but nether the less, the good doctor insisted and all was fine and i forgot about it all.........until a week later!!!

Wow i have never felt so frustrated, angry, upset and ill!! I really couldnt work it out, i was doing everything right, dosing my insulin as normal and eating what i usually eat at the same time etc.. and i was getting readings like 12, 11, sometimes even in the 14's wheras normally they would be in the 5's! I remember at one point i went from 5mmols up to 14 after half a sandwich :o! I did control tests, changed my insulin cartridges and i was still getting the same results! I got so angry and frustrated, blamed myself and just thought well tomoro will be better...but it wasnt and this carried on for 9 days!! I was on half term thank god, as i really dont think i could have worked a week on those levels, i felt so ill and run down, stayed in all weekend and most of the week unable to do anything and scared to eat anything! The highest level (that i knew of that is) was 21 at one point and that did really scare me...i checked for ketones luckily none!

And then it occured to me about the flu jab i had the previous week, could this be the reason? Well i was fine last year? So I posted on the forum, asked friends and co workers and got replies with a range of opinions and answers and found out it had happened to a few diabetics i knew as well, including my friends son, who had experienced the exact same thing as me after his flu jab...Well i felt a bit better knowing that i could actually explain these high readings so just carried on upping my insulin to about 3 times what i would use normally waiting for them to come back down

...and sure enough they did :) It took 9 days but i am finally feeling alot better and back within the normal range :) It actually felt so good to have my first hypo in ages lol

So i dont know what i will be doing next year....is it really worth going through all this again?! i know we should get the flu jab as there is a risk of pneumonia and further complications but i guess i will just have to think about that next year!

long time...no blog!!!

Ummm apologies for the ridiculous lack of blogging...i dont actually think i have an excuse for it!!

Well here is a few updates from me and the D :)

As some of you may know i didnt have the best bank holiday weekend just gone, something happened that lead me to be a bit of a wreck for a few days, cancelled all my diabetic appointments and clinics and just forgot about diabetes really...thankfully my friends helped me get back on my feet and my things are ok now ok...sort of! dont want to go into it too much...

Anyway on to the good! Since iv been on here i have had some progress on my dental situation (thanks to a lifesaving loan from my dad :) )....Although having a near heart attack when he gave me a dental plan coming to nearly £900 (i need to discuss this with him again)I have had my root canals done!!! WOW i can honestly say it was not nice! The actual work itself didn't hurt and a managed to drown out some of the drill noises with music.... but i had 5....yes 5 injections!!! felt them go in...all the way down and i ended up crying in the chair coz it was so painful he did them both at the same time so had basically the whole of the bottom of my mouth numbed for about 5 hours after and felt like my face was massive lol! even my ear was numb, luckily no hypos and no hypers either and the dentist was really nice (even if i couldnt understand some of what he was saying to me...) :)

So i have had the root canal work done (the worst bit) and now have to go back in this wednesday to have them filled which i am hoping will be a little less painful :S

So not in pain any more which i am liking alot! I just have to get the back one extracted tho and then thats it for now (i have other work need doing too apparently but just want to get these out of the way first)

Numbers have been actually pretty good past week mainly in the 5-7 region which i am very pleased and also lost some weight which has lifted my spirits somewhat

So a few ups and downs but now i am thinking positive that i can keep this all up coz i like feeling happy, makes me realise how much i love my friends and family and that im so lucky in other ways oh a small payrise at work also and re booked all my appointments and clinics too.

Until next time....soon i promise :)

x

Formspring...

I have this formspring thing no, sort of like a Q and A! its on the side here ---------->

So feel free to ask me anything..within reason haha x

One year.....

So i have now officially been diabetic for a whole year

I dont quite know what to write but its strange to think that this time last year i was fighting for my life in intensive care having just been diagnosed with this thing known as diabetes, and i would carry this around with me for the rest of my life...

I feel i have come a long way since that day and learnt a great deal. I have had to change and make sacrafices but i think i have come to realise that diabetes IS managable and that i cant let it control my life and take over me. Sure i get high readings and low readings, and readings that i sometimes really cannot explain...but thats diabetes and its all a big learning curve which i am understanding more and more over time.

fact of the matter is that diabetes is a full time job...with that constant fear of future complications which i try not to think about but i do worry what will happen.

So what have i learnt in my first year? what changes have i had to make?

Injecting

Not just learning how to inject myself, no there is alot more involved here....working out how much to give myself and what times of the day, working out my insulin ratios, learning to adjust my insulin if im going to do exercise or am more active. building up the confidence to inject in public, knowing how to dispose of the needle after i have finished, trying to to stick yourself with the needle when you put the cap back on, learning to live with the tiny bruises/marks on my body due to sticking myself with a needle 5 times or more a day...especially when i hit a muscle! :(

Testing

i test before a meal and after a meal so seems simple enough right....not when you take into account that the blood meter usualy has a mmol variation between 2-3mmols...then its not so easy, for example i could test myself on one hand and have a reading of 5, then on the other hand i may be 7....so which level do i inject for? the higher one? may give myself too much inslulin and hypo...the low reading? may give myself too little and hyper! what if im planning some exercise?? that just complicates things even more..so testing...not so simple but i have learned how to deal with it

Carb counting

Apparently i am now a carb freak and nutrition queen! not such a bad thing i suppose actualy quite handy. i have learnt how to carb count and adjust my insulin accordingly...well most of the time, Also taking into account i may need to lower it if i am going to be more active and so on. working out ratios and what foods are good for blood sugars and what foods i should cut back on, not to mention the fat content of what im eating...that just messes everything up!

Oops i think i am beggingin to rant :p

So what about some changes?

Well i now have a kit i carry around with me everywhere and always carry a stash of jelly babies and also a source of carbs.....bit of a pain when going out for the night but i do manage. I also have lucozade by the side of the bed which i hate looking at every morning i wake up but its there...

I suppose the biggest change had been the diet, and i suppose i can class this as a 'good' change...i am eating alot better and also cut back on the weekend drinking as i only drink once or twice a month now which actualy makes me feel alot better!

I have learnt what foods work for me such as i avoid pizza, pasta and bread like the plague as i just cant seem to avoid that late spike and can never get the dose right. I do miss them but not as much as i thought i was going to, maybe if i get a pump i will be able to have these again.

It appears i have become more organised booking blood tests twice a year, eye scans, making health centre appointments for my diabetic screenings, and i think i now reguard the doctors surgery and the chemists as a second home...

Lastly i have made a great network of new friends who have helped and supported me soo much! they have taught me to carb count, help with my inslin worried, hypo situations and just all the little questions i have had have all been answered, i would like to say thankyou to all of you for supporting me, my friends and family too who have all been there for me.

Well i think i have written something productive and maybe even started to rant a little bit oops! sorry but thanks for taking the time to read my blog

until next time..
xx

New year....New start

Let me start by saying happy new year to you all :)

Well it appears i survived my first christmas with diabetes! Although i did think back to the previous christmases.....eating selection boxes for breakfast....nuts, chocolates inbetween meals, then the christmas dinner with all the trimmings...followed by a massive bowl of trifle! (yes i really did eat that much!) :) So this year i decided not to deny myself anything and just go careful...i think i did ok had a few highs which was expected but nothing really major and no lows either which i was happy about, but i did jack up a hell of alot of insulin to compensate!

...So the year of 2011 has started and unlike the previous years i didnt make any resolutions as i dont tend to keep them so there is no point really! My year started ok, im now back at work and it feels good to be back into a routine again, not wasting my days sitting around doing nothing as i am used to lol. I became an auntie in december to a beautiful baby girl called chloe :) who is now just over a month old!

I am feeling alot more positive about this year and decided to start taking better care of myself and looking out for number one for a change, to stop worrying so much and enjoy life without letting the d get the better of me.

The year has gone soo quick and my diabetic birthday is approaching fast, i think i have accomplished alot this year and been through alot....coming out the other side as a stronger person and ready to handle anything thats thrown at me in 2011....so bring it on!!!

2010 review.....

So here is a brief summary of my year 2010....


1. What did you do in 2010 that you'd never done before? Started blogging :)

2. Did you keep your New Year's Resolutions from last year and will you make any for 2011? Nope i didnt make any this year as i never stick to them

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yep, my niece was born on the 5th december :)

4. Did anyone close to you die? Nobody died.....although i could say my pancreas did....

5. What countries did you visit? No holidays this year...:(

6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010? More confidence, a better diet, and more will power.....maybe a nice man too? lol

7. What date from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory...and why? 21-02-10 my diagnosis day

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? Not sure it counts as an achievement....but having to deal with all the shit i have had this year and coming out the other side as a stronger person

9. What was your biggest failure? I admit to failure...but again have become a stronger person because of it

10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Diagnosis of diabetes, syatica, anemia, various colds, bugs, broken teeth...shall i go on?

11. What was the best thing you bought? I dont have the money to treat myself to much lately but i would say my christmas do was worth the money :)

12. Whose behavior merited celebration? will have to come back to this one...


13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
I can't really answer this

14. Where did most of your money go? Paying the rent and bills, and the food shop....i dont have much money to myself these days

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? The thing i was most exited about was my christmas work do with all the girls, and starting the new year :)

16. What song will always remind you of 2010? Oh there is loads...umm i think the song i most danced to was we no speak americano..brings back good memories haha

17. Compared to last year, are you...
...happier/sadder? Sadder in a way having everything to deal with, but things are improving
...thinner/fatter? Put on a bit due to the whole diabetes thing
...richer/poorer? A little richer due to my second job :)

18. What do you wish you'd done more of? talking to people about how i was feeling....not bottling it all up, should of had more fun and not let the D get the better of me

19. What do you wish you'd done less of? worrying and stressing about everything

20. How will you be spending New Year's Eve? I spent my new years eve with good company and a few drinks down the local bar

21. Did you fall in love in 2010? Do shoes count...? then no :(


23. What was your favorite TV program? love come dine with me,inbetweeners, misfits and also catching up on my prison break episodes

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? i dont think i hate anyone - maybe dislike is a better word


26. What was your greatest musical discovery? I wouldnt say i discovered any but i found lots of new artists i like

27. What did you want AND get? A double bed, which i got it for my birthday, and my tattoo :)

28. What did you want and NOT get? I really need some GHDs and am still waiting lol

29. What was your favorite film of the year? Ooo its a tie between inception, shutter island, and kick ass

30. What did you do on your birthday and how old were you? I turned 22 this year and celebrated at wok with a massive slice of cake...and then celebrated with friends at the weekend :)

31. What ONE thing would have made your year immensely more satisfying? Well thats obvious....Mr right lol.... i can dream :)

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010? not sure how to describe it...just casual and me :)

33. What kept you sane? Friends and family

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Omg has to be Mr Jonny Depp (as a pirate ;) ) and channing tatum, dane cook, and of course ben affleck

35. What political issues stirred you the most? everything to do with the recession and credit crunch

36. Whom did you miss? friends who i havent seen in a while because of either losing touch, or moving away

37. Who was the best new person you met? i met lots of great people :)

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson that you learned in 2010. My health comes first before anything else and also to always be myself

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year: "do you ever feel like breaking down, do you ever feel out of place, like somehow you just dont belong, and no one understands you" Simple plan - welcome to my life