30 things you may not know.....

Well apparently it is invisible illness awareness week! I diabetes is definately an invisable illness....you cant see it in me...and i certainly dont look ill as many people say once they find out..its one of those illnesses where the pain is on the inside and no one really fully understands it or what you have to deal with emotionaly as well as physically...so anyway i have seen this on a few blogs so thought i would also post my contribution to the 30 questions meme :)

Here goes....

1. The illness I live with is: Type one diabetes

2. I was diagnosed with it in the year: 21-02-10

3. But I had symptoms since: only a week before!

4. The biggest adjustment I’ve had to make is: my diet...and wardrobe :( oh yea and sticking myself with a needle 5 times a day for the rest of my life

5. Most people assume: that i cant have sugar!

6. The hardest part about mornings are: testin my blood sugar to find out if today will be a good day or a horriffic day, wondering if im going to break another tooth or when my back pain is going to kick in!

7. My favorite medical TV show is: dont really watch them

8. A gadget I couldn’t live without is: diabetes related - my contour usb, non diabetes related - my blackberry :)

9. The hardest part about nights are: tryin to kick my late night munchies habit and going to bed on normal levels

10. Each day I take __ pills & vitamins. (No comments, please) just the one pill

11. Regarding alternative treatments I: I think they are a load of bollox and people who promote them shoud all go and jump off a bridge! oh yes drink this magical potion of fish oils and grapefruit and you will be cured!!

12. If I had to choose between an invisible illness or visible I would choose: well i would prefer to choose neither but i guess invisible..

13. Regarding working and career: doesnt tend to effect me even though the jobs i have are fairly demanding.

14. People would be surprised to know: that most people i look at..i envy....i envy their freedom and the fact they can do what they want without a care in the world and not having to think about or deal with the consequences...and it makes it worse when i think that i was once like them...

15. The hardest thing to accept about my new reality has been: Accepting the fact that i have this for life and its not going away..there will never be a day off from this illness and i can never get away from it.

16. Something I never thought I could do with my illness that I did was: inject myself...i think that was the initial feeling of shock upon diagnosis..i hated needles!! also getting my tattoo i dont think i would of had the incentive to get it done :)

17. The commercials about my illness: get turned off...just makes me think that i caused it with my poor lifestyle and diet...erm no actualy i got a stuid virus that was not my fault!

18. Something I really miss doing since I was diagnosed is: buying a £4 pik n mix and eating it throughout the day lol

19. It was really hard to have to give up: snacking throughout the day....i used to graze on food and not really have a square meal

20. A new hobby I have taken up since my diagnosis is: blogging :)

21. If I could have one day of feeling normal again I would: have what i want, when i wanted it

22. My illness has taught me: to appreciate the little things in life and what you have becoz u never know when it could be taken away from you

23. Want to know a secret? One thing people say that gets under my skin is: "are you allowed that"? "should you be having/doing that"? Argh! oh and the classic..."i wouldnt be able to do that" ummm well if you want to live you would!

24. But I love it when people: treat me like a normal person and dont miss me out when passing round something sugar-laden :)

25. My favorite motto, scripture, quote that gets me through tough times is: "that which doesnt kill us, makes us stronger"

26. When someone is diagnosed I’d like to tell them: that they are not alone

27. Something that has surprised me about living with an illness is: life goes on..iv been through an awful lot and think i have become stronger and accomplished things that i didnt think i could do

28. The nicest thing someone did for me when I wasn’t feeling well was: visit me in hospital and brought me a ton of magazines to read and a very heartwarming letter :)

29. I’m involved with Invisible Illness Week because: i think people need to become more aware of these illnesses and become more educated so that they can better understand them

30. The fact that you read this list makes me feel: like im not alone and i have raised some sort of awareness to someone

:)

same old story....

Finally back on the internet - stupid Virgin Media!!

Cant belive its september already....been back at work now for two weeks and its actually good to get back into the work routine and doing some much needed exercise haha!

I have found my ratios have changed and i now need alot more insulin than i used to....even foods that have no carbs i need some insulin for...i think my honeymoon period may be finally over :( have been having alot more hypers lately but i am eating alot better i think.

Things were going well..until today..went to the docs as my back has started to play up again and turns out i have a syatic nerve which is causing me alot of pain all day and night! Well he also said that the diabetes may be contrubuting towards it and wants me to do blood tests next week to find out and then i may be reffered to a physiotherapist :(

So once again just when things have been going ok for me, iv been kicked to the ground again! im trying to be positive i really am just its hard when things like this happen on top of everything else im having to deal with already

Time flies.....

Well its been 6 months today since the big D....not quite sure how i feel except a little sad and thinking about my old life...even though i know i shouldn't as this makes me more sad..!

So i am being positive now...i think i have accomplished a fair bit in my first 6 months. i have learnt to carb count, work out ratios - including setting my basal rate and splitting it, inject and test regularly - also in public, and got a fairly decent AIC result :) i have dealt with a fair few emotions and managed to come to terms with my diagnosis, i have educated others about diabetes and hopefully have raised some awareness that was not there before, i have even had the privilege of meeting some lovely fellow diabetics and hope to meet many more along the way :) i have had some good days and some awful days and i am continuing to learn more and more each day.

I have a great support group online as well as my friends and family and i dont know what i would do without them. The support group have helped me soo much in these 6 months, answering every question i have had, big or small and whatever time and i am just so lucky to have people who help and more importantly understand. My friends and family have been fab and although sometimes they dont fully understand the illness and what im going through, they stick by me and support me no matter what i am am really thankful to have such lovely people in my life :)

So im going to admit that i havent been the best diabetic these past few weeks, my levels have been...ok i think i need to sort my evening ratios out a little as i always seem to end the day above 10 and have to correct before bed. But i think this is all to do with me being off for the 6 weeks summer holidays as i have not been at work, therfore not active at all really, and totally out of routine! not been eating the best things and slipping back into my old habits :( I think things will start to improve when i go back to work and settle back into my old routine, infact im sure they will!

Well..6 months gone...lets see what the next 6 will bring :)

Worth it... :)

1 hour and 20 mins of pain....and here is the result!

I never thought i would be brave enough to get a tattoo! i had always wanted one but never got the courage to go through with it and i cant belive i did it!

I was shaking like a leaf when i went, had butterflies and was so nervous...i felt a little better however as my wifey came with me, even though they didnt let her actually come with me (not too happy about that) she waited for me in the shop for 2 hours bless her!

The tattoo itself i am soo pleased with, it means so much to me as it has the date i was diagnosed and also the diabetes ribbon encorporated into the centre! the guy who did it was really nice and reassuring, always asking if i was ok and chatting away to me, he asked about my diabetes and i told him the story and he just made me feel really at ease :)

And the big question your all asking...did it hurt? in a word....YES! lol but as the title says it was sooo worth it!

I would like to say a massive thankyou to Sue, as without her i would not have been able to have this done :)

Putting faces to names!

Well on saturday i swapped my usual lazy, lie in with a hangover sort of day, and got up super early to catch the train! Why u ask? to meet some fabulous people from the diabetes forum of course!

It was a great day , i met with shiv, duane, and tom at the train station and we headed down towards the good old weatherspoons where alan, amy, sam and a few others were waiting!

Nice day, had some yummy food and went on to walk the southampton walls and ended up in a nice little pub :)

It was soo nice to meet all the people that had helped me through the tough time when i was first diagnosed, and lovely to put some faces to the names on the forum! I am very much looking forward to the next one and perhaps meeting even more people :)

Not many photos taken but the one above features all us stuffing our faces :D

hard to say goodbye....

Long time no blog!

Emotional week this week as all the children at pre-school are growing up and are now leaving to go to the infant school in september :( am gonna miss all of them sooo much, the two years i have known them all has been brilliant and some of them being my key children makes it even more difficult to say goodbye :(

We had the leavers presentation/fun day today, parents brought in pressies, and flowers galore and all the children were dressed up and looked fab! was a really good, but emotional day i think most of the staff were welling up including myself...so now my cupboard is full of chocolates and i am wishing i was not diabetic lol.

Things are starting to look up :)

Im really looking forward to going back in september as i managed to get myself a job :) its just cleaning but it could not be more perfect...its an hour and a half a day and starts straight after i finish my pre-school work so it will just be like working a normal week and i still get my weekends! And to top all of this off i got a pay rise which will start as of september woohoo so hopefully all these money problems i have been having will be behind me :D

Not only this but as i have finished work for the summer...6 weeks!! i have managed to get myself a summer job covering staff holidays in a nearby nursery so that i keep busy and earn lots of money which is greatly needed!

I am so happy that things are starting to turn out for me finally after all my bad luck! i just have to keep optimistic about everything and hopefully nothing bad will come along and burst my bubble!!

Oh and powerwalking starts monday!!

Now for those chocolates...... :p

One of those days.........?

Arghhh!!

Quick rant i am so frustrated right now!

So after some really good levels and a good hba1c result my blood sugars just are not behaving today! i went to bed on 5.9 and woke up on 7.9 ??? had breakfast perfectly carb counted and also an extra unit to bring me back into range.. and four hours later i am still 10.3! WTF at this point i wanted to throw my meter out the window...:( not hungry at this point decide to have a late lunch (bar a handful of nuts inbetween) so check levels at half 3..6.5 a little better thankyou! bolused for some liz granola and low and behold four hours later....8.2 :'(

I know these levels arent like reaalllyy high but i just do not understand them! and it is so frustrating as i think im the one not being able to control it...is it just one of those days or have my requirements changed :(